i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
So squirting runs in the family.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
