Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Such a big mess for such a small penis
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
