Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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