dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
