Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize