check it out our google latitudes are spooning
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
