You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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