And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize