i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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