people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
