I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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