Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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