'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
