Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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