it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
