Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
