Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
