Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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