I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
