If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
