I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Randomize
