At least make sure they are 18
Why
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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