Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
