so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize