She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize
