A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
