How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Randomize
