I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
