Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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