Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
