I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
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