thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
