i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I want to make a zoo with you.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
