Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize