You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
