he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
