Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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