hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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