thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
