Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
