so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize