Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize