from now on my penis is your penis
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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