i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
