What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
