i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
