There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize