Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
We named our party play list daddy issues
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I just had sex on a roof
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
