His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
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