I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
